Defining your Role as a Wedding Vendor in a Wedding
Alright wedding vendors, is your best friend getting married or someone in your family? And you know what is coming next, right? They are going to ask for your specialty services for their big day! Which is an honor, right? Oh and they asked you to be in the wedding. Now this is where things get very tricky. Here is a little advice and my opinion on the very fine line between working a wedding and being in the wedding. Don’t do it! I’m just kidding! Haha! Seriously though, it is very hard. Obviously if you are a photographer it is impossible to be shooting the wedding and be in it. So don’t feel the added pressure to bring your camera just to take random pictures throughout the day. This is a day where you can enjoy the festivities and let someone else capture all the moments. But if you are a wedding planner let’s say, do not spend the day of the wedding running around with your head cut off making sure everything is in place. Even if you are a control freak and it is driving you nuts! Try to relax! You just spent all that money on a dress, shoes, wedding gift, etc. so sit back with the ladies and enjoy the special day. It is easy to want to be in control of the service you specialize in but we are surrounded by so many amazing local vendors. Have faith in them and spend the day worrying about, well, absolutely nothing but having fun! How often do we get to act like we are royalty and be catered to for a day?! I have been a bridesmaid/maid of honor in three weddings just last wedding season! Woo! It is not easy and can be very challenging. I’m so very thankful that my family and friends have asked me to be in their weddings and provide makeup and hair services. However, I was so worried about getting everyone else ready that I forgot about myself. Or I get up at the crack of dawn, I mean 5a.m. and do my hair and makeup so that I am completely ready and I can now spend the whole day getting everyone else ready. I wanted to sit down and have someone else do my makeup and hair. I want to relax too!
Here is my advice to my vendor community, don’t provide your services for the whole day or the whole wedding party. I learned after a few times that I should hire my team to come and take care of the bridesmaids and I would only focus on the bride. I’m a bridesmaid also, I want to hangout, laugh and relax with the girls. I found myself running around doing everything but enjoying the day and celebrating love with my friends and family. It is an honor to be in a wedding and asked to provide a service but as a vendor do not over work yourself. Be honest with the bride about your role and let yourself enjoy the day. I think it is very thoughtful of a bride to ask for our support to be in the wedding and provide a service. You know their heart is in the right place. However, keep your roles defined and set boundaries. If you do want to provide a service, don’t go overboard. There are a lot of beautiful memories created when I’m providing makeup and hair for the bride, especially a loved one. On the other hand, that is where my line is drawn, everyone else is on their own! Hahaha! Do not be nervous to be open and honest to the bride. I know, I know, it is very scary to tell a bride no! Especially our loved ones but in the nicest way possible. Explain to them that you want to be there for them in a different way this time. You don’t mind doing this small task but you would love to relax and spend the day with them not for them!
Oh and one last side note! If you are a vendor and getting married, do not, I repeat, do not provide services (if this is possible) for yourself! On my wedding day I did my own makeup and I helped my bridesmaids do their hair! What the heck was I thinking! I didn’t sit down and soak in the moments. I was doing updos before I went to walk down the aisle! Let go people! You don’t always have to be in control. Trust in someone else, close your eyes and relax! This is the one day that you can do whatever you want and no one can say a word!
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